E is for everything, but I do not love everything.
I wasn’t going to include humans in this challenge theme, but hopefully the fact that he’s a fictional character will negate that, even though in a fantastical world with numerous races, he is, of course, human.
The world is all grown strange.
The world is Middle Earth, the book is The Lord of the Rings, and the man is Éomer. Almost alone among feminists, I do not give a tinker’s cuss about the gender disparity etc etc in the books. Let me tell you briefly why; because it was the early twentieth century ffs, not to mention Tolkien’s careers. Stop pointing that tampax at me, none of it makes me a vagina traitor or whatever the ferk … etc etc.
Éomer! Éomer was Éowyn’s brother, nephew and adopted son of Théoden King and at the time of the bits you might have seen in the films, was the Third Marshall of the Riddermark. If you’re not a nerd like me die hard fan, you may remember him as the dude who saved Merry and Pippin from the orcs, or possibly as Karl Urban. I hope you remember him at the battles of Pelennor Fields and the Hornburg too.
“It is hard to be sure of anything among so many marvels. The world is all grown strange. Elf and Dwarf in company walk in our daily fields; and folk speak with the Lady of the Wood and yet live; and the Sword comes back to war that was broken in the long ages ere the fathers of our fathers rode into the Mark! How shall a man judge what to do in such times?” (The Two Towers: The Riders of Rohan)
His sword was Guthwine, his horse was Firefoot, he went on to become the king, he married Lothiriel … and I’m not fangirling at all … ahem. Karl Urban will no doubt be thrilled to hear that I like him very well in the role. The character you see on film is a great portrayal of the book version. Éomer is serious, loyal, brave, determined, ethical and generous of spirit. I am totally not sighing like a fanboi now and wishing I was him. Nope. I certainly don’t wish I was one of the Eastmark Rohirrim and could follow him into battle. Not. At. All. E is for escapism too.
Note to Gandalf: Let Éomer kill Grima Wormtongue next time ffs.
Here’s Èomer calling bs on Saruman the Shite:
“Lord, hear me! Now we feel the peril that we were warned of. Have we ridden forth to victory, only to stand at last amazed by an old liar with honey on his forked tongue? So would the trapped wolf speak to the hounds, if he could. What aid can he give to you, forsooth? All he desires is to escape from his plight. But will you parley with this dealer in treachery and murder? Remember Theodred at the Fords, and the grave of Hama in Helm’s Deep!” (The Two Towers: The Voice of Saruman)
No flies on Èomer yo. Not even one. The man is integrity with a helm on top. Rawr. And this, ohhhhh this …
“Out of doubt, out of dark to the day’s rising
I came singing in the sun, sword unsheathing.
To hope’s end I rode and to heart’s breaking:
Now for wrath, now for ruin and a red nightfall!”
(The Return of the King: The Battle of Pelennor Fields)
Brb going to kick some orcs. Stirring stuff. Apart from all the general brave and honest hotness, there is Rohan itself. That’s another thing about the films that made me happy; it’s just as I imagined it. I love the lands, the horses, the banners, the … you get the gist.
I’m so glad that Tolkien gave Éomer a happily ever after.
Bless this entire post. Screen capture used gives heart palpitations.
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:)))
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Soooo much *sigh*
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I love that you love Éomer so fucking much and your fascination with LOTR. I’m envious actually. I don’t have that kind of connection with any author’s fictitious world. Now if only I knew how to pronounce it…..
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Ay-oh-mare :)
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I think that sort of fantasy connection might be the province of teenagers and childless slackers … y’know, people with too much time on their hands :)
Either that, or it’s simply being a nerd.
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I love nerds ;)
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Omg I’m a nerd AND a lesbian – I’m like … the hottest version of humanity in the world right now. Either that or a day forcing myself to be shiny and happy and sociable has kicked my ass into hypo-drive.
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Urban. Related to Keith? Forgive if I am ignorant. Ok ok, you caught me, I AM ignorant. I saw the hobbit only many moons ago. I read the books more moons ago than that. Soooo…
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Apparently not, but apparently there have always been rumours that he is. Karl is a kiwi tho. And noooo you’re not ignorant – just not very nerdy ;)
http://lotr.wikia.com/wiki/Karl_Urban
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Not nerdy??
Well apparently not! lol
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You’re with the cool kids!
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Funny you should say so, I was invisible in Grade and high school so I found a way to be cool ever after: Nursing school and beyond: Good nerdy jokes, great grades, kissing the butt of whoever was necessary, being very VERY helpful to the detriment of my everything… I don’t know if you would call it “cool” but I am not invisible anymore. it worked/works but what a mess I have become. I think being invisible is more of my goal now that I have bipolar. :(
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Maybe uncool is the new cool. I have no idea, I’ve never been within spitting distance of cool. Obviously I’m not advocating for spitting on cool. Or am I?
Life is both brutal and beautiful, sometimes at the same time.
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*SWOOOOOOOOOOOON* Hiw did the Orc kicking go? Did you get Saroman too? Treachery abounds. *shakes tampax* Tolkien is genius! Èomer-i liked him best, too. Carl Urban does that eye brow thing that gives AAAAAAAAAAAALLLL his characters that “deep in reflection” thought…if I wore panties they would have spontaneously combusted. POOOOOF! I agree on the way Rohan looks on screen. And by all means, Fangirl/Fanboi away!!
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STEP AWAY FROM THE TAMPON!!! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! Etc. That’s so awesome that you’re #teaméomer too – although obviously I am far better at it and more devoted than you. Erm. We said fanboigirling was fine, right? OK BITCH, TAMPONS AT DAWN – WE BATTLE FOR SUPREMACY AND KARL URBAN’S BOXERS! Ahem where was I …
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Oh yes, you are President of the #teaméomer fanboigirling club. I am devoted, but not NEARLY as much as you, obviously. Can I be secretary and take notes?! *Raises tampon in unity* TO KARL URBAN’S BOXERS! Can I lick his cheek? I have no idea where you where..I was in bed and…well…
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Hahahaha tell you what, since I’m a dyke anyway, you can have Mr Urban and his underwear and I’ll dream and sigh over fictional Éomer. You can lick him wherever the hell you like :D
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DEAL! I still want to be secretary of the fanboigirl club though. Then I’ll know EVERYONE’S secrets! *shrewd eyes* MWUHAHAHA! WHOOPS! Was that out-loud?? I get a Karl Urban lollipop!
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Lollipop is a euphemism, right? Pervert.
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MAAAAAAAAAAAAYBEEEEEEEEEE
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Omg you and your caps lock. The horror, the horror … (yes that is a test).
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Pffffbt. Apocalypse now, Marlon Brando. LOVE that movie. Martin Sheen, Denis Hopper and a BABY Lawrence Fishburn.
Hello, my name is Sass, and I have a caps lock addiction.
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Gooooooood blogger.
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Thank you. “Im gonna make him an offa he can’t refuse”
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Oh I have the WORST dirty mind and sexual innuendo abound with me. Hop on the bus Cuz this bitch be driving at full speed!! BEEP BEEP BITCHES
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I snorted my orange juice tyvm. XD
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Mission accomplished! My day is complete. Cute Neighbor Guy check out my legs, you snorted orange juice, I am awesome. *Exists stage right*
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Hypomanic much?
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Ok. Éomer, Kurt Cobain. Choose one.
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DUH EASY! Éromer. I know I just pissed some people off but..oh well. I have a unhealthy relationship with “fictional characters” *coughs* bullshit
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Loooooool … I can’t decide between them. #foreveraslacker
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Im team #eddievedder for my 90s grunge. #sorrynotsorry
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I am #teameddievedder from about 2005 or so on. Took me a little over a decade to get over the initial pj/nirvana rivalry and stop sulking. Love him to bits.
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I was always PJ from the beginning, Nirvana a VERY close second. I love 90s grunge. No other music like it.
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The 90s were my 20s and I’m still very much stuck there in various ways. Where were you on the Blur/Oasis divide?
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Oasis. I was in my Tweens n teens in the 90s. Everclear too
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Blur.
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Now I need to pull up Spotify
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Auteurs … lemonheads … fnm … ratm … pj harvey … etc etc etc
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Yes yes YAAAASSSSS
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Carter the unstoppable sex machine, teenage fanclub, primal scream, the charlatans, the farm, the frank and walters …
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AAAAAAAHHH! My 90s grunge is on overload!! Keep EM coming lol
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Smashing pumpkins, throwing muses, big star, therapy?, pixies, husker dü …
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*ftp my ipod to you*
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*catches awkwardly* Got it!
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I also have a thing for British men..could be my main reason..
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Reason for what?
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Liking Oasis-i love love L O V E British men
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I’m the way you are in regard to LOTR
with any works by Madeleine L’Engle.
It’s good to be obsessive when it comes to writers like Tolkien & L’Engle! Healthy!!!!! I bet reading their works creates more brain cells! Xo
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Definitely healthy as long as it isn’t unhealthy. I figure it’s all good as long as I don’t learn one of Tolkien’s languages. If you hear me jabbering away in Sindarin, grab a dartgun.
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ahahha yes! Éomer is the stuff :)
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Oh yeahhhh Rohan REPRESENT! And so forth.
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