what if jesus had been medicated?

Trigger warning & disclaimer: I am no christian and it’s not up for discussion. I’m not rude about it, but neither am I reverent.

The Good Luck of Right Now – Matthew Quick

fatherless + fat + jobless + ugly + Mom is your only friend x Mom dies – you are approaching 40 years of age
─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ───
abused grief counselor + bipolar priest + in love with Girlbrarian x possible alien therapist + Guinness at Irish pub

Equals where I am right now!

This is the second Matthew Quick novel I’ve read and I’m still fairly eh meh about him, but the addition of Christ to the list of historical figures diagnosed post mortem with bipolar amused me. In lieu of a review, because I’d basically only be repeating what I said about The Silver Linings Playbook, some quotes about bipolar. I did prefer this novel though. Feel free to answer the quote I used to title this post in the comments. I am adding sweet bipolar baby jebus to my arsenal of expletives.

If he’d been on seroquel, Jesus would have been fat. If he’d had citalopram he wouldn’t have been interested in se….oh!

“It’s a chemical imbalance,” Father Hachette said. “Bipolar people sometimes have too much of the happy chemicals in their brain—which makes them feel as though they can do anything. And this can lead to erratic, impulsive, and dangerous behavior.”

“These manic upswings are always followed by terrible downswings—fierce depressions. The bipolar person can become suicidal and dangerous.”

“I understand why you would be attracted to Father McNamee. His passion can be beautiful,” Father Hachette said. “Extremely beautiful. John the Baptist beautiful. Elijah beautiful even.”

Father McNamee:

“You know Jesus was most likely bipolar,” he said, nodding with great enthusiasm. “Preaching love your enemies one day and then flipping over the money changers’ tables the next. Turn the other cheek, and then it’s all swords and righteousness.” Father raised his right hand and said, “‘These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace,’ John 16:33. ‘Do not think that I came to bring peace on the earth; I did not come to bring peace, but a sword!’ Matthew 10:34. Seeking out multitudes to heal and feed and awe—and then escaping on boats to quiet places, praying alone in gardens. What if Jesus had been medicated?” He raked his fingers through his beard. “Do you think he would have been so eager to give his life for the world? That’s not a reasonable, rational thing, after all. People don’t volunteer for crucifixion when chemicals are placating their minds, hearts, and souls. No one would want Jesus taking mood-altering pills, right?

“Besides, this is why God gave us whiskey,”

I googled bipolar jesus and found an anonymous rationale for the hypothesis. Of course, I found tons of miracle cures too – you can quit bipolar if you set your mind to it etc. And this meme:


If, like me, you wondered whether Matthew Quick himself is bipolar, here is the answer:

It wasn’t until I was 30-something years old that I admitted I had anxiety issues, that I would sometimes get depressed. Now I go and talk about it openly all over the world. At 29 I never would have even admitted it.

Rah rah stigma busting … er, is there anyone else who read/saw any of his stuff and just thought meh this is pathetic compared to Benny and Joon and What’s Eating Gilbert Grape?

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battlescarred, bright, bewildered, bent, blue & bipolar

36 thoughts on “what if jesus had been medicated?”

  1. Lol. That meme is the ” buddy Christ” from the movie “Dogma”. I never saw Jesus as bipolar, more like frustrated because he had a whole lot to do in a very short period of time.


  2. Honestly!
    I have never heard this theory but I cannot help but think there is a history of all manners of madness in religious figures, cult leaders etc. St Paul is long though to have had temporal lobe epilepsy. The problem with forensic psychiatry (especially on a figure for whom we have no first hand accounts) is that there are many conditions and circumstances that can contribute to delusions, depression, ecstatic behaviour. Having worked for years in brain injury I can’t imagine that there were more than a few historical folk with few to many knocks to the head which can lead to behaviour changes, mood instability, even psychosis.
    If you personal hammer is bipolar, suddenly the world is full of nails!


      1. Looking forward to that. The thing I have noticed is that people with bipolar are quick to list all these gifted artists and heroes (even if some of them were right bastards at times). But my first though often goes to bipolar when I hear of sudden and horrible murders, especially when the perpetrator was a bright successful individual with no diagnosed mental illness. For example there was a situation at an end of year house party this spring where a person who had been invited finished his shift at work, arrived at the house and suddenly went crazy at some point, stabbing and killing 5 people he didn’t even know. He was a bright kid, just accepted to law school and his parents were devastated. It looks like there were some changes in his behaviour in the weeks before but no explanation for the action. They are still trying to assess whether he can be held criminally responsible but sounds like bipolar to me.
        If we are going to take credit for the heroes, we have to have a special empathy for those who end up on the other side of history.


        1. That’s a very very good point, you should blog that … get people talking. Dunno if you’ve heard of Oscar Pistorius here (athlete with no legs who made it to the normal Olympics) – but part of his defence (murder trial) was GAD …………… o.o


          1. Yes, of course the Oscar Pistorius story is well known (I am a news junkie anyway). The fall from hero to criminal is so dramatic but sadly the truth is probably so much more complicated. We also know that so many people who sit in jail suffer from mental illness and addictions.


            1. Doesn’t the news depress the fuck outa you?

              There’s a whole tv channel dedicated to the Oscar trial here, I’ve seen a bit at a friend’s place.


              1. The news scares me when I think about the world tensions but it also reminds me that my problems are nothing compared to those in so many other parts of the world right now.


                  1. Exactly, living in western Canada where old is 100 years old (if you ignore the fact that there were people on this land before the British arrived – we have had South Africa lecture us on our abysmal treatment of our aboriginal populations) it is easy for people to live in blissful ignorance…

                    My we are being philosophical today :)


                    1. Well you know that ALL the great philosophers were bipolar, right?

                      I always thought Canada was kinda perfect, because it’s one of the few countries to actually grant first nation status (south africa has not), till I talked to Percy Paul and an old friend of mine who I’d always thought of as totally liberal and who turned out to be the only Canadian racist I’ve ever spoken to.

                      Eh maybe we shouldn’t be going down this sad road idk …


  3. I have no on the books, having never read this author…yet! But the whole thing made me snort, including the “He loves you. He loves you not” poster at the end.

    Loved “Dogma”. First saw it at the suggestion and home of a friend who used to describe himself as a “Recovering Catholic”. I think he’s the one who gave us a “Buddy Christ” statue for Crimbo.

    As for “sweet bipolar baby jebus”…JHC on a pogostick, but I love that. Must use it with care, though. I am not Christian but have some dear friends & colleagues who are.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. So honestly I love post. I started laughing out loud. I shared it with my hubby and his reply “if Jesus had been medicated the spikes wouldn’t have hurt as much”. Okay, so it’s not funny. OMG, yes it is.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Some of the Christians that I know refer to the bible as the Sword. They say that that Matthew quote of Jesus saying he brings the Sword means he is bringing the words for the New Testament ….the Sword.

    Of course I do not know if Jesus was referring to a real sword or the Bible. It is just another opinion of that word that Jesus used.

    As far as I know he did flip the tables over though. I always thought that was cool and would like to have seen him do that. Those money changers were very arrogant and narcissistic.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Maybe they were drunk. “he’sh bringing the *hic* the thingy… shwordsh wordsh ah feckit, sword.”

      I reckon Jesus was cool too, as a man and freedom fighter/terrorist.

      *waves to the cia*

      Liked by 3 people

      1. I am laughing out loud now….picturing my ex mother in law….haha…

        Telling my little nieces and nephews to go get their Sword for church….haha
        One of these days my nephew Nick might go get a toy sword instead of his bible..

        Actually that would be so funny …..Annie ponders passive aggressively….Aunt. Mimi might have to go to the dollar store and buy her dear nephew a sword…

        and tell him that it is what Grandma is asking him to go get for church….haha. I would have to send one of my kids down with my phone to get a picture of her face. …

        She thinks she is being very Cool when she refers to the bible as a sword….she has this impression she is a cool grandma and not a prude or a fuddy duddy……but my 18 year old begs to differ.

        Plastic sword…. Haha. .what time does the dollar store open?

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Why am I writing on old posts…..? I don’t know. It is almost 8am and I am still lying in the bed awake….
    I just did it to chat instead of thinking about this shooting sciatic pain that will not let me sleep …in addition to my brain keeping me awake with things running around and around in there…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ouch that’s a long and wakeful night. I think I fell asleep at 4am last night. This morning. I thought I’d just go through it, but 3hrs sleep was good and I went to the beach when I woke.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Can you get through a day on 3 hours sleep?
    Maybe I should try it today. It is 1020 am. I still am awake. I must be in some kind of hypo manic thingy.
    If I end up sleeping a little bit..maybe i will sleep tonight?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ja, 3hrs, 0hrs, whatever. But not forever, of course; eventually there’s that old familiar crash and burn. And yeah, you probably need to deal with your hypo to deal with your sleep. Meh…

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes you are right. My health insurance kept being delayed but I received medicaid cards and HMO cards that go with the medicaid a few weeks ago….but the date of ” active” on them said Aug 1st

        So I just had to hold them until now. Now we are in August so I can make an appt.

        My primary care physician wanted me to be seen several months ago and she gave me some numbers to call but those places wanted the medicaid.

        I will start making calls tomorrow since I know there will probably be a delay or waiting list or some such thing.


        Liked by 1 person

        1. Of course there’ll be delays and queues and so forth…. We don’t go through enough shit as it is…. :( but I’m glad you’re in the system, now you just gotta advocate for yourself in getting the most out of it. Don’t delay those phone calls, get someone to help or do them if necessary. Onwards to a slightly improved existence! (lol)

          Liked by 1 person

        1. Always? Yooo gots mad skillz dude. I retain my sense of humour fairly far down, when I lose the laughter, I know I’m in trouble. Oh yeah, any strength mixed episode does it too. Motherfucking disorder.

          Liked by 1 person

          1. I’ve got kids which means I mask pretty well. Emotions and expressing them might be learned behavior for normal human beings (not so much alien me), and I don’t want them to learn these feelings or do anything drastic b/c they feel something uncontrollable. Plus my little alien offspring do sometimes come up with really funny things sometimes. It does sometimes hit me that hard, which really sucks. I make everyone go away, and they just kind of leave me to myself when I need it. But at least I’m usually on an almost measurable trend-line. I encourage them to journal, to express, to create, to destroy (mostly appropriately), as healthy vents for unhealthy emotions. Wish my parents knew more when I was younger. Motherfucking disorder indeed. Pray they don’t inherit it. Or they can cope.

            Liked by 1 person

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